Monday, October 20, 2014

my biggest fear

Today's #blogtober14 prompt is a hard one for me. There are a lot of things I fear both big and small. I'm a huge scared-y cat and things like haunted houses or scary movies. I was almost dragged to one this past weekend and almost started crying at the thought of it. I know. I'm obnoxious.

But some of my bigger fears are disappointing loved ones or, perhaps worse, myself and/or failing at goals I've set for myself. I think maybe what I fear even more than failing is simply not doing. There have been several things in my life I haven't done because of some type of fear whether it's been anxiety (which I have a loooot of), homesickness, loss of control, etc. 

I've rationalized decisions and sat on the sidelines out of fear something wouldn't go the way I expected or wanted it to. I've missed out on opportunities because of it in the past and am working very hard to not miss anymore in the future. I've come to the conclusion that I am my biggest obstacle. I've often claimed other people or factors as reasons not to do something until recently coming to the realization that it's me

I can only control my own actions. I have the power to make decisions and do things for me. So, in order to silence that fear of not enjoying things or experiencing everything life has to offer I'm going to take that trip, and write that book, and cook the hardest recipe. I'm going to take that leap so I'll have a life to look back on instead of memories sitting on the sidelines. 

Yes, Dr, yes. 


Be sure to link up with TaylorHelene & the rest of us for #Blogtober14!


  1. Love your post! Some fears may not be rational but they are totally real!

    1. They most definitely are. I kind of like that they're never rational haha it's comforting. If they were all somehow rational we'd all be nuts.

      Thanks for stopping by!

  2. So you basically summed up my life...the fear I didn't really mention in my post today was the fear of failure. Like you, I have a lot of anxiety (I mean a lot) and I'm always complaining about how I wish I were like so-and-so without taking any real steps to get there. I get it! I've tried to start challenging myself to take risks whenever I can. I've failed a lot, sure, but I think it's already made me more risk-averse. Great post.


    1. Thanks, Tay! I've recently been doing the same thing in terms of pushing myself out of my comfort zone and taking more risks. Starting this blog was a risk for me! if you can believe it. I had so much anxiety about starting one, even though I wanted to more than anything, because I was always comparing to other bloggers I love to read and assuming mine wouldn't be as good. & now? I love it! and so glad I did it. I try to remember that things rarely end up being as bad as I think they'll be so I don't need to have so much anxiety about stupidity haha.

      Ahhh, life is such a learning process, isn't it?
      Thanks for stopping by, I appreciate it!

  3. I really dislike haunted houses or mazes or anything like that too. And I completely agree that often times it isn't fear from an outside force that keeps us down, but it's ourselves.

    1. Thanks, Rachel. I definitely agree and I know for me personally, it's almost always me and my own issue I have to work through.

      & yes! I just don't get why people pay to be scared... I just can't.